Monthly Archives: October 2014

Sometimes Dead IS Better

 

Keeping with the horror movie theme for October, I decided to watch “Pet Sematary” for the first time. I’ve heard about this movie my whole life, so I confidently chose it out of the sea of scary movies on Netflix. I mean, 2 ½ stars can’t be wrong, right?! (Ha.)

Despite it’s cheap, made-for-tv approach, I appreciated “Pet Sematary” for at least adhering to a few scary movie truths…

1) Moving into an OLD house in a NEW town is BAD juju.

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2) Foreshadowing is key.

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3) Creepy neighbors know all the creepy secrets.

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4) Foggy paths into the woods are no bueno.

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5) Undead animals are not cute.

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6) Undead kids are not cute.

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7) Aaaaaaand undead spouses are not cute.

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There were a lot of disappointing things about “Pet Sematary”, but I was most disappointed that this movie wasn’t actually about a pet cemetery. I imagined that there would be lots of cute zombie animals running around and causing mischief. But, nope. Just one ugly cat and a buncha gross stuff.

My official reaction:

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You’re a Vampire?! Wait ’til Mom Finds Out!

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I started off my October by watching “The Lost Boys” for the first time. Like I have said before, I try not to read up on any of the movies on the list and then I watch them with little-to-no context. I was pleasantly surprised when 20 minutes in I realized that this one was about vamps.

TBH, I’ve really only watched “Vampire Diaries” and the “Twilight” series. I know… So, I took this as an opportunity to examine the vampires in “The Lost Boys” and their quality traits. Here’s what I learned:

-Vampires NEED to wear (really cool) sunglasses.

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-If you’re immortal, you don’t have to wear a helmet when you ride your motorcycle.

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-Also, you can do really stupid things on said motorcycle without fear!

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-If you are really good looking and you live in a town called Santa Carla, you’re probably a vampire.

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-If you go from being really good looking to really ugly looking at snack time, then you’re definitely a vampire.

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-Also, weird mirror reflections = vampire.

-Vampires are bullies.

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-They like, can make you think you’re eating maggots instead of fried rice. That’s messed up.

-To become a vampire, you must drink the blood of another vampire in a very sexy way.

-Even vampires are still scared of their moms.

-Lastly, a stake to the heart will kill ‘em every time. In this case, it was some antlers in Grandpa’s taxidermy room. Hey, whatever works!

My favorite part about watching this 1987 classic in 2014 was laughing at all the mullets and leather jackets. Seriously. It was also fun (and frightening) to see the ugly side of vampires. It might have been nice if they had been a little more… romantic? Ugh. I know. I’m pathetic.

My official reaction:

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